Overheard at the 2005 MTV VMAs

Overheard in the men’s restroom at the 2005 MTV Video Music Awards.

Informant: Sup, Diddy, what’u rockin’.

Diddy: Aw man, this thing is dope. Check it out, I wuz at the crib, cruizing the triple W peeping da goods for VMA gift bags. I read about this iPod Shuffle from this dope site, and I said I gots to get me some of these! I had my biotches hookup Stevie J on my celly, and we had a tete a tete if you dig. I said, “Stevie, Diddy needs them Shuffles for the 05 VMAs, but none of this white sh*t. Theys got to be gangsta!” My man Stevie is da bomb, and he hooked us up with these bad boys. Even preloaded with all the love from Fat Joe and 50 Cent. Now beat yo ass outta hea before I pop a cap in your grill.

…flush…