Stereotyping Dancing with the Stars
Season 5 of Dancing with the Stars is starting already! Was that short or what? Must be only a few months ago that last season finished with Apolo lifting off with the championship and host Samantha Harris announcing her pregnancy and just giving birth.
Tonight is the first night of the three-night premiere of DWTS featuring a full lineup. Here’s my stereotypes of the dancing stars.
- Melanie Brown (aka Scary Spice). As a Spice Girl, Scary is used to performing in front of an audience so she should be comfortable. But the Spice Girls reunion and paternity issues with Eddie Murphy could be distractions.
- Sabrina Bryan. A young’en partnered with a newbie? Not a good combo.
- Helio Castroneves. As a race car driver, I’m expecting mental toughness and and unflustered nerves of steel. Partnered with champion Julianne Hough can’t hurt either.
- Mark Cuban. Pure emotion and putting it all out there. Have you seen him at a Mavs game and how animated and excited he gets as a fan? Imagine what he could be as a performer.
- Jennie Garth. I got no vibe for Jennie. Might be a little past her prime in popularity and having her dance with Julianne’s brother makes me feel uji for whatever reason.
- Josie Maran. Could be a smoldering combo with Alex Mazo. She’ll fit right in with the revealing costumes the professional female dancers wear.
- Cameron Mathison. Who? These relative unknowns simply don’t fare well. He better be an awesome performer cause Edyta can only carry him so far.
- Floyd Mayweather. Him paired with Karina Smirnoff is a tough duo. I’m expecting determination and the burning desire to win as a boxer.
- Wayne Newton. Doing Vegas shows for years and paired with fan favorite Cheryl Burke, Wayne will be a crowd favorite. The older guys last until the mid rounds when the two dances a week wear them down.
- Marie Osmond. Not sure who she’ll appeal to. Unless she can shake what her mama gave her, she’s the first one out.
- Albert Reed. Again, who? Since he’s a model, his looks will buy him some time unless he dances like Tucker Carlson.
- Jane Seymour. I’m expecting elegance and grace from Dr. Quinn.
Ladies first tonight on Dancing with the Stars.
Related: DWTS Season 5 Recap
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