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The Blessings of Being Taylor Lautner’s Boy Toy

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I can’t deny it.  I am Taylor Lautner’s boy toy, and I have been blessed.  Look at this past week’s search results for Pulpconnection, domination by the New Moon hunk.

  1. goteamjacob.com 390 times
  2. taylor lautner 361 times
  3. taylor lautner underwear 150 times
  4. apple happy friday 96 times
  5. taylor lautner steroids 50 times
  6. taylor lautner in underwear 49 times
  7. www.goteamjacob.com 32 times
  8. taylor lautner pictures 31 times
  9. bella’s lullaby sheet music 25 times
  10. goteamjacob 25 times
  11. pictures of taylor lautner 19 times
  12. hpdirect.com/deals/friendsandfamily/starbucks 18 times
  13. taylor lautner modeling 17 times
  14. team jacob underwear 15 times
  15. teamjacob.com 13 times
  16. taylor lautner calvin klein 12 times
  17. taylor lautner abs 12 times
  18. team jacob.com 12 times
  19. taylor lautner model 11 times
  20. taylor lautner photos 10 times

From recent analytics, I knew I <3 Twilight, Jacob and Taylor Lautner, and these latest stats enforce Team Jacob’s fandom.  But would I have guessed that pimping out Jacob Black would turn into a blessing?

In December 2008, I made the switch from Google’s Blogger to WordPress, and Pulpconnection visits tanked.  Links and URLs broke or changed, ruining Pulpconnection’s standings with search engines.  But look what happened in October and November 2009, activity finally caught up with and exceeded averages from one year ago.

pulp-stats-2009

That’s the blessing of  being Taylor Lautner’s boy toy!  So I’d like to say thanks to Taylor, he of the washboard abs.

Taylor Lautner Abs

New Moon, Better than Twilight

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One year ago, the launch of the Twilight movie series got me and the missus back in the movie theater. One year later, it’s New Moon that brought us back to the big screen. So how was New Moon through a pair of even older eyes? Better than Twilight is my to-the-point review.

But first, some notes and observations.

The Non-crowd

Setting records with $140M made on its opening weekend, you know the theaters had to be packed like Ward Theaters during the premiere showing.

From the Red Band Project

We didn’t dare the crowds then, but instead went on a weekday where there were like a dozen people in the theater (and two baby strollers).

Summit Entertainment’s Been Busy

remember-me-stillBefore the movie started, there was a bombardment of movie trailers, many from Summit Entertainment. This studio has been busy… and efficient. Lots of multi-purposed (euphemism for reused) themes, locales, and actors in the previewed trailers. Pierce Brosnan and Robert Pattinson in Remember Me. Pierce Brosnan in The Lightning Thief. Amanda Seyfried in Dear John and Letters to Juliet (was that filmed in Italy, same as New Moon?).

Youthful Elders

I had this complaint in Twilight with the elders looking a little too youthful and that trend continues in New Moon.

Aro and the Volturi

The ancient though immortal Volturi look too young to be the feared vampire royalty. Hard to be scared of pale looking pansies if you know what I mean?

A Well Matched Soundtrack

While there’s no breakout song like Paramore’s Decode from Twilight, the New Moon soundtrack is well matched to the mood of the film. Dark, somber, and depressing. Don’t try to work out or run to this downer of a soundtrack.  Each song was well placed in the movie and really accentuated the emotions of Bella, Edward, and Jacob. And there’s more variety to the music than the countless variations of Bella’s Lullaby in Twilight.

Bella Line of Sleepwear

Victoria’s Secret or GAP Body take note. How about the Bella line of sleepwear?

new-moon-movie-still-bella-and-edward-bedroom-2

bella_inbed

Taylor Launter Needs to Thank his Personal Fitness Trainers

When Bella hits her head after falling from her motorcycle, platonic pal Jacob Black is there to mend her bleeding wound. He peels off his shirt at which point the audience gasps admiring Taylor’s now chiseled body.

New-Moon-new-moon-movie-9153424-500-333

Taylor really needs to reward his personal fitness trainers for his new found success. How about a stay at the Grand Wailea Resort in Maui?

“Loose Change”

New Moon centered around the love triangle between Bella, Jacob, and Edward, and these characters expectedly had the most lines. Most of the other major characters in the story had such minor roles, almost like loose change compared with the benjamins of Swan, Black, and Cullen. Which of the significant characters had the least amount of lines? My guess is Billy Black who had one scene failing to stop Bella from seeing a sleeping werewolf boy.

My Favorite Character

My favorite Twilight/New Moon movie character has to be Jasper. The young vamp has to stand there looking dazed all the time with his unkempt hair. He did have his one defining part in New Moon wanting to eat Bella but other than that, dazed.

new-moon-movie-still-jasper

Yup, yup, New Moon the movie as with the Twilight books aren’t award winning or even masterpieces, but they sure have an allure about them. Can’t deny the appeal and box office success. So how was the movie? Better than Twilight. I’ll say 3.5 stars with more action than Twilight and flaws fixed from the first flick. Worth a watch, at least once especially now that the theaters aren’t packed with howling Twihards and wanton Twimoms. With the improvements in New Moon, there is definitely momentum going into Eclipse scheduled just seven months away on June 30, 2010.

A Twimom’s New Moon Top Ten

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Twimom Jessica reviews the movie sensation New Moon with her top ten reasons why she loves the movie.

11/20/09 – I’ve been waiting for this day for months. I’ve seen the trailers countless times. I read the book for the third time. I didn’t want to go into it with high expectations, but I couldn’t help it. I’m happy to report that I was not disappointed!

Here are the top reasons I loved the movie (includes spoilers). [Keep in mind, I’m a little fanatic about the books, therefore Stephenie Meyer’s written word is my point of reference. It’s hard for me to see it from any other perspective. I’ve heard recently that if you haven’t read the book, the movie is well, not as enjoyable.]

  1. The movie was filmed beautifully. Just visually stunning. I loved seeing the book come to life, especially the wolves phasing and the Volterra scenes.New Moon's Bella
  2. It was true to the book. I would have been upset if they left out the dream sequence with the old lady/Bella or the October, November, December pages.
  3. Speaking of which…I actually felt some emotion while watching, unlike my experience with Twilight the movie. I cried throughout the breakup scene and the aforementioned Oct, Nov, Dec scene.edward-and-bella-breakup
  4. Jacob was actually likable. He was less annoying in the movie than in the book. The friendship and his importance to her were believable. My pervy middle aged friends think he’s hot. Yikes he’s 17. At least Rpattz is 23!new-moon-movie-still-jacob-and-bella
  5. Edward had on slightly less makeup than in Twilight.bella-and-edward-kiss
  6. I liked the additions or enhancements, rather. Because the book is told from Bella’s point of view, the scenes with Laurent, Harry Clearwater’s heart attack, the Victoria chase were described in past tense, third hand. Much better in movie form.bella-and-laurent
  7. Wolves phasing were cool. OMG, Catherine Hardwick would have butchered that.
  8. Speaking of Catherine Hardwick – sparkles! Much better this time around.Robert Pattinson
  9. Michael Sheen was perfect as Aro! Funny and scary all wrapped up together.Aro and the Volturi
  10. Alice’s vision of Edward and Bella running in the forest. Did anyone else laugh?Edward-Bella-running

I can’t wait for Eclipse! The countdown to 6/30/2010 begins!

Team Twilight on the Cover of Entertainment Weekly

Catch the cover of this week’s Entertainment Weekly featuring the Team Twilight trio known as Taylor Lautner, Kristen Stewart, and Robert Pattinson?

team-twilight-ew-cover

The uncensored interview was pretty boring, but with New Moon releasing in 5 days, why not capitalize on the craze? Just like what I’m doing with this blog post! 😉

For Pulpconnection’s coverage of all things Twilight, follow this lead.

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